This is the time of year when my dogs most personally resent the "lifestyle choices" that spouse and I have made. They say, yes, meat is murder, but surely turkeys are only manslaughter. They see the Thanksgiving grocery store commercials on the television and smell giblet gravy and turn up their flat, leathery noses at Tofurky. If you and your family have any extra table scraps for these spoiled, fat, farting bastards, please mail them to our house in a greaseproof envelope so they will shut up.
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