This Is: Driving Excitement!

I saw this bumpersticker today: It reads "Don't let the car fool you. My treasure is in heaven!"

So, what have we got here?

1. Pride: Look at my nice car!
2. Avarice: I need money for nice things!
3. That most Christian of virtues: self-righteousness!
4. I'm going to Heaven, asshole!
5. My nice car doesn't even MATTER!
6. Maybe you can get this car after the Rapture, assuming it didn't get totalled while I was sucked into Heaven while driving Trevor to soccer camp!

Anyway, I've got to get back to work on my new Atheism decal, which is in the shape of a happy fish in bed on Sunday morning with a paper and a coffee.

Family Reunions!

After many years of searching, Echo and the Bunnymen's family found them in a Sunday supplement ad from Camera World, although the dog was unfortunately cropped. Yes, just like Pete DeFrietas. I'm so glad to see everyone back together.

I'm 37, I'm not old!

It's been awhile since I had a party, so I'm going to have singing (to Baby Ketten Karaoke, who have the best book in the business!) and drinking at my party next Friday.

Put some LAFFS in your HOLE! This Wednesday!

SEATTLE! Look out. For Christ's sake. I'm gonna be up there. Really soon. There's very little you can do to avoid it, except, I guess, not show up at Chop Suey on Madison at 9. But what fun would that be? I'm traveling with the always-odd Christian Van Wade. You can buy tickets here!

Emily Post-Punk

Politeness is important. Here are my favorite polite comments to offer, especially to stand-up comedians.

"You looked like you had a lot of fun up there!"
"Wow, you're really committed to that material!"
"You've got...a lot of energy."
"I don't care how many times I hear 'em, I love those jokes!"
"You got more laughs than it sounded like."
"That's right, screw 'em! You keep doing what YOU think is funny."
"You're so brave to get up and do that!"
"You...and I mean this...you do more with less than anyone in this scene!"
"I sure admire your persistence! Keep it up!"